No matter how much I love her, its going to be quire impossible to get back together.... All she wanted was me to proof of my love for her.... Even though its going to mean that I would have to give up a future, and my dream.... My friends are getting married... Most of them... Some of them now have kids le too... I'm envious....
I could have just ignore her..... I should have just forget about her.... But I couldn't... It's not a matter of just any one to get married to.... It's only her that I want to marry.... Maybe this feeling is only temporary.... Maybe I'll be able to move on.....
She wanted me to be by her side... without expectation of having a small chance to even start a family with her.... The thing I get in return, is the woman I love.... 得到你的人吗？I don't need just someone to be in a relationship with... I'm looking for a romance.... Would she just treat me the same??? Only see my importance when she's scared that something terrible is going to happen in her family.... Other than that is just me asking about her..... No one asked about me.... Not her.... If I had trouble, or feeling down, she would just tell me to stop acting like a kid.... All I needed was a little attention from her.... all I needed was to still feel like I'm loved.... She couldn't do that for me... yet she talked about true love????
She don't need me to do anything for her to do things for me... crap... She's always the one to expect me to change this change that in the relationship.... When she's around, answering a phone call is even prohibited.... I need to be rude to the person who called me..... I need to message her everyday whether or not I have things to say..... whether or not I have time to do it.... If I forget, it's my fault....
I love her... I know I do.... else I wouldn't be feeling the pain right now... But everytime, she just want to be selfish... and take something away without giving anything extra in return.... She wanted to stay the same... She don't want to change a thing.... She just want to take... and take and take..... I'm not a free buffet you know....
She earned my love??? The reason I loved her till now, was just because she is the one... nothing she did makes me loved her less.... I dunno how much more I could love her too... The reason for her being the one??? she doesn't care if I am a poor bump, a fat, ugly bastard..... Everywhere we go, people stare at us... like what the hell this fat man did to deserve such a good looking girl like her..... I dun really care... I know we've been through lots to get together.... It's not easy getting in relationship with her, it's not easy to even maintain the relationship through this distance.... I've wanted more than nothing else to get this relationship over with for a long long time... I wanted to remove that distant forever and just have a normal relationship like everyone else with her.... I want to be able to meet her after work for dinner and walk... I want to be able to see her every weekend to do things together.... I want to chill with her 1 on 1 for the whole day, doing nothing but just be with her....
Why does she wants a long distance relationship permanently? Isn't she tired of the feeling of unsure???
Deep inside, ask yourself.... If you don't think I love you, why do you suddenly want this relationship back???
My answer to my own question: She's the girl, who never gave up on me being away from her, started as friend, continued on till romance.... she's the girl who is willing to ignore my financial incapability.... she is a woman who love her family members much... I like the way she is so unselfish with her love for her family, even though she didn't like her sister, she ignore that differences and do what's right..... I see her as the mother of my kids.... She don't mind that she's paying for all our times together, something I wants to do for her back for the rest of my life....
You gave up on me..... because you didn't want me to suffer.... but the fact is, no matter what, I'll suffer.......
I chose to give up on you, not because I don't love you no more... it's your decision I want to respect....
I love you.... I could just easily agree to your terms.... But would you want to see me unhappy throughout the whole relationship??? Does my happiness means anything to you???? What would you do to make me happy in the future??? Is all I want to know.... Please dun make me feel like I'm robbed off my future... The last thing I want to feel for this relationship is felt like I'm doing more things against my will....
