Raining heavily.... Dad ask me to go buy something for him.... tell me to wait until the rain stop then go.... the rain was heavy.... Then all of a sudden... the rain got heavier.... Dad demanded that I go and buy the things he need now.... with the dinner.... All the criteria before doesn't matter... He dun really care to wait a little longer... he believe the rain would be heavy until it will flood the whole car... He insisted that I go.... When the rain was heaviest.... I went.... The rain was heavy... and so was my heart... I was disheartened.... I would never ask someone I love to go into such a heavy rain... I walked into the car.... I dun really care.... Since he dun care..... I got wet.... I went to Big C... buy his thing. Buy dinner.... The rain stopped when I came out of Big C.... took about 20 minutes to stop.... upset......
They watched cars 2..... I had nobody to watch with..... I told her that I would have to drool at the poster.... All I wanted to hear was she will watch with me again if I want to watch it that bad... All she could say was "That means what? I can't bring Kemp watch movie? Don't say that type of things again"....
Heartbroken.... I am taking a strategic performance measurement class this semester... The lecturer asked if we could measure love?...... He said there was no 1 single performance index that can indicate how much a person love you..... But this.... This would be in the negative value of love indexes..... Really wonder how love works.... Is it just adding and subtracting? or is the negative value a zero to multiply it with.... feelin deserted..... alone....
This post would definitely earn me another quarrel... I have a haunch.... But seriously... I have noone to turn to.... I finished my dinner ASAP so that I wouldn't have to face my dad for too long.... I don't feel like seeing his face.... I regretted listening to him complaint... I regretted feeling sorry for him.... I regretted respecting him......
Her.... I really dun want to quarrel.... I shall not say anything like that ever again... I would never do things that would test her love for me.... it would only make me upset.... it would only make things worse..... I can choose to think that she don't mean anything she said.. But after so many times le... it just felt like this couldn't be the reason... we had talked over it.... we had even quarreled over it..... or I could also imply that it's her natural reaction towards me..... Why would she have this type of natural reaction???? simply because she can when it's me.... I don't know anyone else she does this to.... Even the person she complained to me most... she would consider her feeling.... What am I....
